what WW and BM are saying....
Ladies, I want you to check out the following words written by a racist, and in my opinion 'hating' white woman and the subsequent responses of 2 'brothas'
#14488By sunshine gurl
I disagree with a message I read somewhere about white women feeling jealous of black women. I'm a decent-looking white girl, and I'll admit that there are some women of other races that I might feel a little jealous of from time to time, but they are definitely not black women. I have never had a boyfriend leave me over a black woman. Sure, I have had a boyfriend cheat on me or leave me for another white girl or even a Korean girl, but not for a black girl. None of my friends have ever had a boyfriend cheat on them or leave them for a black woman either. Now, if the boyfriend I'm seeing right now eventually cheats on me or leaves me for a black girl (which I seriously doubt), I would not take him back. I'm saying we don't have to listen to this bull, that we are the worst women out there. There are a lot of black women jealous because we are white. I would say as long as you are not really overweight or ugly or something, we don't have to ever worry about competition from black women. Now there are some Asian, Hispanic, etc. women that do get on my nerves occasionally. My friends sometimes do feel a little jealous of Asian or Hispanic women too. One of my friends has a boyfriend who has cheated on her with a Mexican girl, and she felt really bad about it at first because he didn't stay in his own race when he cheated on her, so it made her feel even worse than if he had just cheated on her with another white girl. I mean I felt this way too when my former boyfriend left me for a Korean girl. Does anyone else identify with this? Have you ever had a boyfriend cheat on you or leave you for a woman of another race and you just hated it too?
Here is the interesting part. The women on the board (all races ) immediately got into a verbal cat fight with 2 WM coming in to tell them that all women were beautiful in their own way and that the attitude of the woman was most important.
2 Brothers immediately came on board. Now if you were waiting for them to echo the remarks of the WM you would be sadly mistaken. Their ignorant remarks are as follows:
Caj is #1
MJ is a sista arguing with them.
And Emmetmays is # 2
caj (BM #1)
With no disrespect intended, I don't see any reason why White women should harbor any jealousy toward black women. As a black man, I've noticed way more BM / WW relationships than WM / BW relationships. White women are way more attractive looking and much more pleasant to be around.
M.F (black woman trying to talk sense to these 2 fools)
your an idiot man, white women are in no way more attractive than black women! either you aint black or your just a typical media zombie, you follow what the media tells you is attractive, you got the whole 'white is right' **** going on. tell me whats more attractive about them....their flat bodies? you obviously can't handle a black women, you know their too strong minded for you and you know they will put you in your place if you disrespect them, your basically a weak person, cop out.i'm mixed white/black and i find black women the most attractive race in the world, and i aint talking about light skin with white features(beyonce) i mean real black women, black features and dark skin.
Caj
First off, I am black and I don't know about being a media zombie. But, what I do know is that WW come in many different eye colors, many different hair colors and there bodies are nicely shaped. I love the color of their skin, the texture of their hair, and the color of their eyes. They're not fat like a lot of BW and their hair isn't nappy. Also, some BW are just too black for me. I'm not saying that every WW in the world is attractive and every BW in the world is unattractive. I'm not saying that every WW is more attractive than every BW. What I am saying is that, in general, WW are more attractive. I just like their features better.
(Posted by Mermaid Another WW)
Hi, I've been reading some of the messages, and some women here are just saying some really bold politically incorrect things (especially concerning blacks) that you aren't really supposed to say in public, but I guess who cares since no one really knows us here anyway right... I'm going to go ahead and give my opinion too. "Sexy latina girl", you are right about these black women being the ugliest and having the worst attitude, and I agree with you on that; I mean there can't be much argument about that obviously. You're also right that some of us Caucasian women feel jealous of Asian or Hispanic women occasionally, but so do you girls feel jealous of each other sometimes too. And you cannot just make the generalization that Hispanic women are better-looking than white women. And not all of us Caucasian women get sunburned easily. I just had to correct some of what you said because you are really slandering white women, and it's not fair. We are just as nice as you Hispanic women are.actually latin women dont look better than light skinned black women for example halle berry look better than eva longoria and jessica alba also can anyone name women who look better than light skinned black women?
emmettmays (BM #2 coming in)
Light-skinned black women definitely look better than dark-skinned black women, but not as good as white or latina women. Halle Barry is beautiful, no doubt, but she's not as attractive as Eva Longoria or Jessica Alba. Even so, Halle Barry on looks good because she's mixed. Most regular black women are ugly.
MF
IN YOUR OPINION; light skin and white women are the most attractive and real black women are just unattractiveIN MY OPINION; dark skin real black women are the most attractive and light skin and white women are unattractivethey are just personal opinions i suppose and everyone has their own, neither of us is stating fact so i guess we can leave it at that. i didn't mean to come at you like that but I'm sure you can appreciate that i was just defending what i believe.by the way, you being black, do you dislike your own features?
caj
I agree that both of us are merely voicing our opinions without any concrete facts. I'm just going off of my experiences, and I guess you're doing the same.For me to voice displeasure in the features of BW doesn't imply that I dislike those same features on me. I JUST DON'T LIKE THOSE FEATURES ON WOMEN. It's up to women to determine if they like my features or not, not me. Besides, if you've read both of my posts, you would have notice that I do find some BW attractive. I just find non-BW more attractive than black women.....
emmettmays
Quote:
Originally Posted by caj
Light-skinned black women definitely look better than dark-skinned black women, but not as good as white or latina women. Halle Barry is beautiful, no doubt, but she's not as attractive as Eva Longoria or Jessica Alba. Even so, Halle Barry on looks good because she's mixed. Most pure black women are just plain ugly.ARE U SERIOUS ? JESSICA ALBA IS AVERAGE SO IS EVA LONGORIA ALSO LATINAS ARE I CANT DENY THAT BUT I REMEMBER TALKING TO ONE PUERTO RICAN SHE WAS FINE BUT SHE HAD A COUSIN WHO WAS HALF BLACK AND HALF PUERTO RICAN SHE WAS LIGHT SKINNED SO GORGEOUS I MUST SAY I COULD'NT STOP STARING AT HER. REALLY THE BEST LOOKING WOMEN ARE MIXED WOMEN BECAUSE THEY GOT THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS LIKE CHRISTINA MILLIAN SHE IS A BLACK CUBAN
emmettmays
IS THIS AN ANTI BLACK WEBSITE ? THEY TOLD ME NOT TO GO ON HERE THAT PEOPLE ON HERE HATE BLACK PEOPLE. BUT I CANT SPEAK FOR THE SISTAS BUT BLACK MEN WE ******* RULE THE DATING WORLD WE **** LATIN BITCHES WHITE BITCHES ASIAN BITCHES.
caj
I don't care what anybody says. I think White Women are great. They definitely set the universal standard for beauty. They don't copy other women any more than other women copy them.Look at how most Black Women straighten out their hair to look like White Women's beautiful hair. Also, there are dark-skinned women that opt for skin whitening creams to duplicate White Women's beautiful skin.White Women don't get a tan to look like dark-skinned women. They do it simply to enhance their skin tone. When tannned they don't look like any other race/ethnicity of women. They simply look like White Women with a tan.I STILL SAY THAT THEY AR THE EPITOME OF BEAUTY AND THE ENVY OF BLACK WOMEN.WHITE WOMENLATINASASIANSANY OTHER NON-BLACK WOMENMIXED BLACK WOMENBLACK WOMEN
I believe in letting the facts speak for themselves. These opinions being expressed in the most vile, misogynistic, color struck and slanderous way is typical of bm. These are not anomalous opinions. The disrespect and outright hatred being spewed toward us is common among their ilk. As usual a ww starts to make disparaging remarks and the self hating, damaged 'brotha' is right there to cosign. When is the last time you saw a sista (even in an IR marriage sit around and talk trash about BM with her white spouse? You probably never have and never will. But this type of horrendous behavior is typical of brotha's. Did you notice instead of telling either of these ww off, they jump in and agreed? Typical of damaged men. This is what you can expect if you stick around the BC too long. To be used as a booty call/ abandoned baby mama for damaged men like these while they worship at the alter of white women. And for the grand prize, you get to be disparaged at every given chance.
Please come out of the twilight zone and find yourself a good man who'll love and support you. Don't worry about what the brotha's will say, as you can see they are not worried about you.....
posted by Taylor-Sara @ 12:38 AM
126 Comments
126 Comments:
Sara, why did you replace the Bill Cosby post. I had some comments that did not come out because of sometype of glitch.
Those men have issues plain and simple...they forget about their daughters, mothers and sisters. And, for the females who think they do not have to worry about us...think again. The big hold back was us not giving the other race man a try. There are many of us who are educated, slim, extremely attractive and there are many wm who would loved to be paired with us. Ladies, the game is on go and get your other race man! Ann F.
Sara,
Girl, you nailed it! This blog is dedicated to all of the BW who come here and to other IR blogs and ask why do BW on them talk about dating WM. Well, sweethearts, here is your answer.
As always, thanks for an intelligent blog and for keeping it real. Stay Strong Sista!
Peace and Blessings,
Ann C.
very ugly and little hard to read (for me).
I think the next frontier for BW is to wrestle BW away from mainstream media.
Young girls don't need that. Is there a teen blog for young girls?
(that's how I felt after reading those comments)
I'm sorry to ruin your day guys. I was angry too. Seems like we're the ones they love to hate. I just do not beleive you can love the color of your own skin and then hate that color on someone else. Do you know of ANY sistas who hate the color black on black men but love their own skin? No, because that is not possible. This is self hate at it's finest. Like I said they don't love themselves then they project that hatred toward us. And that's why self love truly is the greatest love of all....Ann I changed the post because I wanted to finetune the other one...Don't worry this one won't be up long, I don't like to read it either. It's truly sad how lost brothers are...
And miriam that's a great idea about a blog for teen girls. We need to catch these girls young and educate them on what a damaged man looks like, how to avoid them. self love/self esteem etc.
-great idea!
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hi Sara,
It truly hurts my heart that some black men feel that way about black women, but hey, let them drink the haterode and choke on it. I have a good man and he loves and respects me, so have at the dbr's girls, they are all yours.
Kelley
Sounds like everyone on that board needs some therapy...However, that's not the problem of BW...We must make it our business to avoid the cells of the damaged BC....We MUST NOT raise our children in this atmosphere...(Emotionally and/or physically if at all possible)...
The damaged BM will talk crap about BW and then invade her space when she decides to expand her options....What a joke!...The more 'resistance', the more determined I become to get the message out...
"Black Women Deserve Better"
http://thecwexperience.wordpress.com
So only ww have straight hair? BW are only imitating ww because ww are supposedly the only ones with straight hair. Wow!
I guess they don't realize Asian women, indian women, Mexican women, some Hispanic women all have straight hair...
Sara....
I can read this stuff and stay completely detached from it. I can't even get mad about it because WW and BM do NOT matter to me. In the scheme of things, they matter even less within their perspective races. All I want is for sistas to control our own finances, bodies, health, images, dating lives etc. That is the path to true power. I completely understand why you felt the need to post these comments but, they are nothing new. I really think we give too much thought to BM and WW. Neither of those groups are worth a second thought. We cannot control what others think of us and we all know that. We should concentrate on what we can control...ourselves.
Let bm and ww have their negativity.
That said... you're awesome, Sara and I love this blog. It's great to actually be able to deal with black women whom are mostly my kindred spirits because goodness knows, I don't run into any in real life.
what they posted wasn't even worth being upset about. if that's what they think so be it. I know i look good and i turn heads. if a small group of bloggers want to say im ugly so be it, but i know a worldwide of men find me beatiful and have gone up to me and told me themselves. please! i bet if i were to met any of them they are the ones no one wants to date, and not even get a second look at. people talk about other peoople because they have low self-esteem issue and we all know to well that white girls have the lowest self esteem, so what do they do, they talk shit.just watch the movie "Mean Girls" that's all they are about. i hardly take what they say seriously.
"For me to voice displeasure in the features of BW doesn't imply that I dislike those same features on me. I JUST DON'T LIKE THOSE FEATURES ON WOMEN."
That statement pretty much just says it all. Sara, you were right when you said that you can't like the color/features you have and than dislike seeing them in someone else.
I don't get offended by these dialogues any more. These people just look sad to me. You can't focus your energy on what racist WW (notice how she was racist against ALL women who didn't look like her) and DBR BM have to say, it will only depress you in the end. Focus on people who want to be around you.
As hard is it may be for some sistas to read it, I really don't think u should take it down. Some people will come here and question why your blog exists, well, here is their answer.
And to the sista who felt 'hurt' by what was written, all it means is, I'm sorry to say, that you have not full reached your maximum self-esteem potential. I read it, and was I bothered? Not remotely. In fact, I actually laughed, at their stupidity.
A ww saying that she couldn't say these things publicly? If she was so confident that everyone else shared her view, she would not wait to come online to spew her nonsense. As for the black idiots that were agreeing with them, I knew they were useless the moment one of them said he likes black features on himself, but not on women. Yeah, ok. This is self-hate. So why should any of us be bothered by it. It's their own problem.
I felt the tears swelling up in my eyes reading this! It got me so mad to think that people really think that way. I am a dark skinned woman and coming from a family of mixed poeple who bascially look like Mariah Carey...I know how it feels to be thought of as not attractive.
Torri
I felt the tears swelling up in my eyes reading this! It got me so mad to think that people really think that way. I am a dark skinned woman and coming from a family of mixed poeple who bascially look like Mariah Carey...I know how it feels to be thought of as not attractive.
Torri
BadBlackKitty,
I soooo agree. I really don't understanf why some on here are feeling 'hurt' by these words. How can something a complete stranger posted online bother you that much, to actually 'hurt' you. Please. It's high time bw start paying attention to themselves. If u are truly bothered by what these idiots posted, to the point that it would actually worry you and cause yo to be 'hurt', then honey, I'm sorry to say, but you need help. Self-esteem really is a good thing.
And just so u know, this is a reply from a man who posted on that site:
Here's are some obvious observations about the differences with women of all races! All races have unique qualities that men love or else the races would dwindle and die. Each race brings some qualities to the table that makes them attractive and desired. First of all White women are at the top of the social ladder. They have social opportunities that most women only dream of. In addition they have a variety of characteristics that most women don't have. Hair color and eye color are examples of the uniqueness of white women. The only problem I see is the body image thing. If a white women gains weight they are treated like monsters or outcasts! They also age differently then most women.......25 looks 35!! Yikes!! But I love their sense of style and femininity!
Black women are making tremendous strides in areas of education, homeownership, and as business owners!! Way to go!! Black women have a few characteristics that are very very desirable! The Songs of Solomon (The Bible) speaks of the love of black women. The lips, hips, booty, skin tone (light brown, med brown, mocha, chocolate, dark chocolate) and their skin ages differently & don’t forget the attitudes! Some of the attitudes are sexy and some destructive! (Blaah) Last but not least.....black women have so much sexual rhythm! No other race of woman can move their bodies like black women!!!! Most women want men to make love to them but black women will make love to her man. Often imitated but never duplicated…well with the exceptions of black Brazilian and black borican women!! Black women please continue to make progress and you’ll be just fine.
Spanish women are just flat out gorgeous! A great sense of style and spiciness! I love their attitudes, skin tone, grrrrrrrrreat curves, silky smooth hair, family values, desire for procreation, loyalty and the no condom policy!! Woooo hoooo ……Way to go Catholic Church.......only kidding! Safe sex is the best policy if you are not married!
Asian women have a long history of culture and class! There are so many nationalities to choose from. If I had to choose which I like the best Jap, Chi, Kor ..I would get lost in translation. Their eyes are sexy and seductive! The crow black hair and variety of skin tones is a big plus. I can speak for days about the traditional Asian woman. And when they add a bit of hip hop flavor…..their sexiness is elevated. They are great assets and they mix well with other races!
Indian and Arab women are wired!!! Beautiful but weird! They don’t seem to have the opportunities like other women but I love their loyalty to family and culture. I had the great honor of being with an Indian girl and her sex was like putting a hot knife through butter. Swwweeet…..but way too much body hair! Is this typical??? Arab women are super hot…..I love the purity of their bodies! Only wish they had more rights!
In retrospect, women of all races are beautiful and will continue to be desired by men for whatever reason. Ladies…..men love variety! And regardless how you feel about yourselves…….I love and cherish you all.
White women have that attitude towards black women that a lot of women have with overweight women until that overweight women loses weight and actually becomes your competition. Similary an unattractive woman until she gets a makeover (ie teeth fixed, contact lenses, nose job) or how people who are financially secure who have always had that broke friend until that broke friend starts coming up. Dont ever think that you have people sized up because the very people that you think are not a threat can become a threat overnight. Dont ever think that you have someone pigeonholed. The world and nature does not work that way. They are just euphoric thinking that everyone thinks black women are the pitts. NOBODY stays down like that forever...least of all black women. We all know that black women are the most resilient. Wait til it gets warm outside. You will start to see.
The most disturbing part for me is that these twisted minds can be teaching in classrooms, human resources or sitting right next to you in the office.
I bet there are bw wondering why this ww or bm teacher is failing their kids or why is it their application never made it thru to the hiring manager or why this bm passed her by and never even looked her way when she thought she was looking her best, never realizing it was someone filled with self-hate and/or colorism.
This doesn't surprise me at all, I work with ww and their is one dbrbm that works with there as well. He worships this flat ass, crazy, 35 years-old and still lives at home, very average looking white chick who is insanely jealous of me. So, to get in her good graces(and ultimately in her pants)and because the two of them are too stupid to talk about anything of substance. They both spend most of the work day talking about me and when they cant talk face to face their iming each other, ncompletely obsessed.
I believe that bm/ww really have it in for bw. Bm seem to get some perverse enjoyment out of puting down bw, especially in front of ww and vice versa and especially when that bw has her shit together. So, its bullshit when ww say they aren't threatened by us. They just dont want to admit it but their actions surely speak louder than their words.
"When is the last time you saw a sista (even in an IR marriage sit around and talk trash about BM with her white spouse?"
I hate black men and am guilty of having done this on 2 occasions. And hell yeah my high-earning, good-looking, tall dark and handsome white man agreed with me, that black men are an abomination and make black women look bad.
I might sound bad for saying this, but I think black men need to be put down at a lower standard in society and in the media. This way general society outside black people won't take their opinions highly. This would be the only way for black females to get a chance for advancement and respect from general society. We need to somehow seperate ourselves.
wow! some of those resposes shocked me abit. I have to admit. Anon from the top: it's not a waste of time to talk about this issue because many sistas will not allow themselves to see what is before their very eyes. and they almost have to be forced to face it. To any of you who had your feelings hurt, I truly apologize. I promise this post will not stay up for long...but for those of you on the fence, I felt a little push would definitely be in your best interests....
Not sure if anyone said "hurt" I think I, or they were more disgusted.
(Not saying Sara should take it down, now!)
But its filth. I can laugh at it sure. but its still filth. Sometimes I frown when I sweep my kitchen floor or deal with dirty clothes, but i'm not "hurt".
Sara,
I have been reading your blog for a few months now and have learned so much about myself and my expanded dating options.
This post is on time for me because I have been thinking about this nagging feeling I have lately. I have been approached by BM for dating but I have no desire to go there again since I have had a taste of dating non-BM. I have been analyzing myself and decide if I am being disloyal because I don't want to date BM any longer.
A part of my self-evaluation includes my history with DBR BM and how I felt no loyalty from them but used instead. The anger and misogynistic behavior as reflected in the sample comments you provided is evidence of that disloyalty, yet too many BW insist on remaining loyal to them.
I applaud you for further exposing the mindset of too many BM and the need for BW to chart their own course and interact with men capable of loving them just as they are, beautiful, sexy, intelligent, and desirable in their own right.
Keep up the good work!
Ms. Catalyst
lam said...
This doesn't surprise me at all
......................
Hi lam...I've seen some of your comments before.....hope all is well with your living situation now..I really totally understand all you say (not just in this post)....and btw..I agree with you....Becky is basically lying to herself to keep from crying helplessly. Ladies, make no mistake about it..BECKY IS INSANELY JEALOUS OF YOU..but I have no interest in focusing on Becky, and I am smart enough to know that all Becky is not bad (or crazy like the sea hag in the first post)..but to be extremely truthful, I would have to say that the women I forge the closest friendships with are US.
As for these "men"...lol..Sara, they don't bother me. I am wholly indifferent to them. I do not need their approval in any way, shape or form. I bet 90 percent of the women who comment on a blog like this would not even be INTERESTED in these men anyway. I think they should, and can be honest about who they are. If bm want Becky, Maria, or LuChen that badly...go for it...I could care less...the whole world is my playground (and all the quality non dbr men that reside in it)...these bm do not belong to me.. and I don't want them anyway.
That's all
At first when I read the article, I shook my head, then laughed.
We ARE a threat to them and they know it. The only people they're fooling are themselves.
This post doesn't hurt me in the least. I have known that I'm a threat to BM and WW alike since I was 20 years old. I can look at these ignorant asses with the 2 emotions that most people despise: pity and kindness.
Pity because they are so fucking useless to me and the rest of the world, but refuse to see it. And the kindness I feel towards them is the same sense of kindness you'd feel for any other mentally handicapped being.
Am I offended by this post? Not at all. I think this message needs to go out, and Sara, please, don't take it down. Some women are blind, but they need to see this.
Seeing this while not pleasent - it is never nice to see folks tearing others down or with such poor self esteem as to be nothing but negative. It does not faze me in the least. Yes there are days like all women have when comments such as these directed at me might be hurtful - but on the whole my self esteem and sense of self respect helps me rebound quickly from that.
It's clear that these people have low self esteem and lack self respect. If they had any of either they would stand firm in who they are and not feel threatened by the lives and happiness of others. Folks who proclaim loudest that such and such is not a threat and then attack do so to make themselves feel better. Folks with self respect are confident in their worth and value and celebrate those differences - enough to allow and celebrate differences in others and their happiness.
Respect makes the difference regardless of size, shape or color - it over comes fear, anger, self loathing and all the other pathologies. Women need to cultivate that type of self esteem and self respect in their children that will enable them to stand firm against this nonsense - see it for what it is and that it does not change their value or worth, and overcome it, shut it down and roll on with out it slowing them down. It just reminds us of the need for a blog like this and the support it provides.
V/r
Clarice
Lord have mercy. I actually laughed when I read this. Foolishness at its finest.
To badblackkitty:
I feel you 100% which is probably why I laughed. I don't care about BM or WW or anyone else for that matter. I'll worry about establishing myself, and forming happy life with my White Man.
I'm certainly not hurt. I was more shocked, but at the same time, not if you understand my meaning. I find it very funny that ww think that bw aren't a threat. I have never dated a black guy and most of the men who approached me or that I've dated have been white, asian, or latino. I was engaged to an indian man once and I'm married to a white man. So basically, just because we aren't shouting from the rooftops that we're "taking" their men doesn't mean it isn't happening because it is. I like the stealth bomber approach... ha ha ha...
I posted some of those responses that were probably considered "shocking". I just feel that I need to be honest. As a black woman, I'm not innocent and just a blameless victim of black men, I hate them. I've never liked them; as a group, they disgust me, and I'm just as anti black men as some black men are anti black women. That's A-OK with me, because I think they are the scum of the earth and I'm not shy about expressing that; least of all, anonymously in cyberspace. But, the people closest to me know exactly how I feel. So, before we go around saying that we have done nothing to deserve this chatter and their wrath, I just need to be honest and say that that may be true of MOST black women, but while I have not outright done anything to harm black men or devalue them, I have certainly harboured a lot of hatred for them on the DL, and have never gone out of my way to have so much as a conversation with a black men. They just literally... make me sick to my stomach.
Thanks for this post. It's a wake up call.
We need to realize that we only have one life to live, and we can't waste it chasing and being mad at ignorant people like that that WW and BM. I'm sure you all have noticed that ww and bm lack self confidence/love and when they see a bw with self love, faith in God, self confidence, and self reliance, they hate it and it shows.
I know it's heart wrenching, but BM (even as little boys) have put me down and insulted me and favored white girls since elementary school. Yeah, it hurt, but life goes on and I wouldn't want to date that kind of rif-raf anyway. Those people aren't about anything anyway.
CB
I'll put the cosby post up in a few days, spell check would not work and I need to manually check for typos. Tori C. your family is crazy, you are absolutely beautiful. That was one good thing about growing up in my fam. Even though there is alot of mixing in my family as well, they are crazy about dark skin and think it's too beautiful for words. As a result I always felt confident and happy in my chocolate skin and have never wished to be different. I actually have an appreciation for All skin. I think SKIN itself is pretty in ALL colors. There is a girl at work with beautiful honey colored skin (kinda golden)Some of the women there (both light and dark) are mean to her for no reason. I think it's because they envy that golden skin. I on the other hand like her very much and go out of my way to be nice to her. See, because I was raised to appreciate myself, therefore, I can appreciate others and not be envious. Yes she is beautiful, but since I consider myself to be very pretty (not beautiful though) it does not bother me. This is why it is so important to raise our black girls with self esteem and self love. Later on in life that love will sustain, and hold them up...
Well..... I'm speechless & saddened.
"Folks who proclaim loudest that such and such is not a threat and then attack do so to make themselves feel better. Folks with self respect are confident in their worth and value and celebrate those differences - enough to allow and celebrate differences in others and their happiness."
That's true Clarice. These sorry, bitter, and threatened emotionally disturbed children (healthy adults don't act and think this prejudicial manor) can never be at peace because their self-confidence is in the dumps. And when people don't have self-confidence, they lose all self-respect and sense of decency. They're hatred (based in their own inferiority) overwhelms them and takes over.
It's best for black women to not even concern themselves with the rantings of the disturbed.
Sick WW and BM are merely disturbed spoiled brats who are afraid of "losing the limelight".
And NOTHING steals it more than, happy, confident, beautiful black women.
Sistas, go out there and let your light SHINE!
As more and more BW date, marry, and pro-create out - and especially with WM - you can expect the peanut gallery to go off from time to time.
Ignore it and know it means you're a threat to the powers that be and that's a GOOD thing!
Again ladies, always stay positive. Because likes attract likes.
Remember that.
Karma is also a (excuse my language) b*tch. These sick DBR asses (on and offline) are going to be on the receiving end of every hateful thing they wish to happen to BW and BW/WM couples.
What goes around (non justified hate for instance) comes around. When you least expect it.
- Felicia
kemicutie...That's absolutely right...I am walking/driving down the street and seeing more bwwm couples...BW tend to have more class than to shout it from the rooftops...LOL @ Stealth Mode
Sara, I concur with your self love statement. Also, there are people who are trying their best to tear at our self esteem because they themselves have little self esteeem. Recognize those people
(be it a,b,h or a w person) for who they are and simply try not to deal with them.
Continue to LOVE YOURSELF no matter what the package.
Ann F.
What I find amazing is they(WW) admit their jealousy of certain groups. But find BW not a threat. Then jump and tear down BW--as if we are a threat! Hmmmm it seems to me if something or someone is NOT a threat, then one would not spend time tearing down...(hmmmmmm-smells like a dead fish here.)
I have an appreciation for differences. I have always said, that I am not color blind but appreciate seeing the variation out there. I am thus not threatened by women of other backgrounds and will compliment them. ie. I can see and watch an actress on TV like Catherine Zeta Jones and say..yes she's gorgeous. But that comes from being secure within MYSELF! I know who and what I am, and what I am about.
But yes, with these women being sooo loud in their statements, they are showing out what many WW think and believe. The blog is just a sampling.
Kemicutie said..." I like the stealth bomber approach... ha ha ha..."
_________________________
PM responds...
Eh eh eh eh eh!(Evil laugh)
But truthfully no, I also do not feel a need to shout it from the rooftops. The only shouts I give and to BW to EXPAND their options.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Hi Delishmish,
I am on my way out but I've been giving him a taste of his own medicine.
Thanks for asking.
To the person who always comes here in a disrespectful way, and makes smart ass comments to me. I have one resquest. Either come here with respect for me and my readers or stay on your own little obscure site. I'll hit delete in a second -thank you
"Either come here with respect for me and my readers or stay on your own little obscure site. I'll hit delete in a second -thank you"
Don't mess with Sara. She will CUT you with no hesitation. Stay strong, girl! If anyone can handle a site like this, you can.
Sara-T...That person is probably one of the "regular troublemakers" coming 'up in here' trying to be anonymous...What a joke!...If you have an opinion, put your name on it, claim it, and stand by it...
BTW Sara...I am looking forward to your Cosby post...Wondering if you are going to say the same thing that I've been feeling...
To that particular person.
No, I do not delete people because they disagree with me. People can disagree with me all day long, I have no problem with that provided that they are respectful. You, on the other hand are NEVER respectful! I resented the way you treated poor delish about her stories, when all you had to do was not read them! And I resent the way you tried to beat Halima over the head with your obstinate opinions on many occasions! Then you have the audacity to come to MY blog and belittle me! Since I'm not a bullshit artist, I will be frank, I find you arrogant, pompous and overbearing. I do not like you, and I think you feel the same aversion for me, So lets part ways amicably and agree to disagree.... PS. you are a smart, educated and intelligent woman many people want to hear your opinions, I however, am not amongst that group- good luck in all you do...
Look, I think you all should really relax. I am your typical blonde, blue-eyed ww, and I can tell you that as pretty as I think I am (I've been told this), there is a Black girl in my College who I think is absolutely gorgeous. She's kind of dark-skinned, like Gabrielle Union or Nia Long, and even I know that she is better looking than me. Hell, she's better looking than most people I've seen. (And no she isn't mixed as far as I know. In fact, she's Nigerian).
I've always thought black women were more confident than the average, so imagine my surprise when I saw alot of the comments were from people saying they were hurt and saddened by what was written. Can't you see that if these foolish people that wrote these thing were not threatened by black women, they'd never have attacked you verbally in the first place. I am a ww so I know how ww think. Most WILL NOT admit it, but they, on average do not like any other race of woman, especially bw.
Even though all my partners have been white men, except one, who was latino, I've always been open to dating any race of man, now, not so much. It's happened to me on THREE seperate occasions that a bm would walk up to me in the club, and when I POLITELY turned them down, they go very malignant, saying, "is it because I'm black, you're not that prejudiced now, are ya?" Funnily enough, I overheard one of them saying at the bar that that a certain bw who was also in the club was 'a fool', all because she was dancing with a wm. It's not every ww who has issues with bw, but from what I've seen from alot of my friends and fellow ww, most do.
The women who wrote on that blog have very low self-esteem, as do the bm who joined in. And any bw on here who became so bothered by what they wrote has low self-esteem as well!
On a side note, notice that the very group of women that they say might intimidate them (latino and asian), are the very ones they like. The ones who are no threat, are the ones that they attack. How does that work. White women do feel intimidated by black and latino women, especially black, but most don't really consider asian women that much of a threat, even though this is the grouo that marries wm more. You may not believe me, but take it from the so-called 'Becky' (I kind of figured out what it meant), the only reason any ww would harbour such nasty feelings toward bw is because she's threatened by them. I will not even talk about the bm who posted on that site, seeing as you all have figured them out.
Wow sara!
You sure speak your mind!!!
have you always been so forthright and direct?
That anonymous poster above who is writing alot of silly nonsense about black men, it is quite obvious, atleast to me, that you are, in fact, a black man who is pretending to be a sista, intentionally writing these things about black men, so as to make it appear that bw are as insecure, jealous and bitter as you. So transparent!
Thanks white female, we really appreciate your insight.
To the last Anon. answer to your question: Yes.
Not surprised about the ww poster above. When wm date asian women, ww usually say, she's ugly or the guy is a loser/geek so couldn't get a ww. If he dates a hispanic woman, they say, she's just looking for citizenship or he's just looking for a free maid. If he dates a black woman, they say he's only looking for good sex. So from this, it wouldn't surprise me to hear that alot of ww would be more intimidated by latino or black women than they would by asian women. On average, asian girls tend to be more defferring to their white female friends in high school, and are usually more willing to play the role of best friend (and in some cases, doormat), moreso than black or latino girls. So ww would have gotten used to aw in this role, hence would be more comfortable with her, as long as she only takes the wm that the said ww does not find very desirable.
Let's face facts. Bw like their men to represent. So we usually end up with the wm that other ww want. That is why bw are more threatening to ww than anyone else!
To the so called white female poster above, you are either a bw or wm posting as a ww, or, more likely, you are just an ass kissing ww.
I could care less about who bw date, unless its someone I want. Yes, you're right. Most ww don't care when asian women date wm. Why? Because they date the ugliest wm, who are always almost losers. I don't know about latino women. If bw want us ww to stop being bothered when you take our men, do like asian women. It really annoys me when I see you bw dating good wm. Who the hel do you think you are? If you were dating the old, ugly and broke ones, then you are joking if you think ww care. Wm only used to go outside of their race when they couldn't get a good, pretty ww, so that is why it confuses me when I see a very handsome, well educated wm with a bw. You bw have started taking our good men.
Just because alot of us dated and married rich bm, you now want revenge and are taking our good ones. I was so shocked when I saw on these sites the white celebrities and rich wm that are with bw. I just don't understand.
Even when I was in high school, the nerdy white boys usually dated all these average lookin asian girls. Then you would see some black girl, who obviously thought too highly of herself, dating the hottest guy in school, like the captain of the football team. This is a guy that even most white girls would not dare talk to, yet some black girl would get him. My friends and I were angry. Don't think we were jealous or anything okay. We WERE NOT. We just didn't like the fact that this hot white boy overlooked all of us and went with this girl.
So to that white female poster, stop kissing ass. WE ARE NOT THREATENED BY ANYBODY. We just don't like it when these bw take good wm. I mean I see people like Halle Berry dating an extremely gorgeous wm, DeNiro, Boris Becker, and many of these Hollywood hunks that would date bw. You all should be like Shar Jackson and you wouldn't get any problems from us. You can have the K-Fed's. If you want us ww to not have problems with you, then be like aw and only date the undesirable wm.
In addittion to what I wrote above, ww like their mammy. They will be as racist as Jim Crow, but they will always lurve their mammy. Why do you think Oprah is so successful? The only problem now is that she (Oprah) is more powerful and richer than them, so she can't really play the mammy role the way that most ww want. Afterall, how do you explain the black/asian female best friend in all these hollywood films and shows. Ww will always want their mammy, and since we sistas decided to stop playing that role, and go get ours (education, business, home ownership etc.), they knew they had to go look elsewhere (asian women). I have an asian female friend, and I've tried to be subtle and tell her how things really are, butshe can't see sense beyond her nose. She practically puts ww on a pedestal, even though she won't admit it. Actually, she puts white people in general on a pedestal. She was even embarrased when I found out that she spoke cantonese at home. Frankly, I'd rather asian women than black women be their 21st century mammies. We've played that role too long, now we're headed for the top.
Forget what these stupid people say, love yourself and get yours. The sight is always much better from the top.
I'm not surprised by the statements of the ww or the bm. I'm sure many bw have heard similar things in the course of their lives. However, I know that a person who takes time out of their day to tear me down for no reason has nothing better to do and is probably not worth my time.
To the person who said she "hates" all black men: Hate begets hate. If you hate someone who hurts you, you're wasting energy on them and you're frankly just as bad as them.
Kaytea,
that poster WAS NOT a bw. That is a bm posting as a bw. I have come across their type before. He is just trying to make bw look bad.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
"That anonymous poster above who is writing alot of silly nonsense about black men, it is quite obvious, atleast to me, that you are, in fact, a black man who is pretending to be a sista, intentionally writing these things about black men, so as to make it appear that bw are as insecure, jealous and bitter as you. So transparent!"
Who, me? No, I'm a 22-year-old biracial girl (but I look black). I'm not trying to make black women look bad, truth is I don't expect anybody to be reading these but OTHER black women, and I was very taken aback by the white woman who posted here. I just seriously don't like black men. Just being honest. It feels a little refreshing to just type it bluntly like that. It's bad enough that they're so disappointing as a race of men, but because they are MY race, that in turn affects ME, and makes people think that ALL black people are good for nothing, just because the black MEN are. I really don't appreciate that at all, and that's where a lot of the resentment comes from. But it is becoming a little clearer to me now that people can hear me out here, so I'll just let Sara tell the truth about BM and keep my personal feelings out of it.
To anonymous,
If u say that you are, in fact a bw or bi-racial, I guess I'm just going to have to take your word for it.
On the one about a bw never having raped a ww, well, you'll first of all have to show me a woman raping a woman, so it doesn't flow. Yes, we are often grouped along with black men when they do stupid shit. That's life. All you can do is move on up. When you get in those positions of power, make a difference. Effect change. So that others (sistas) coming after would not have to suffer the same injustices.
Roslynholcomb
there is a big difference between disagreeing and someone who simply loves to argue! That someone is you. Did you notice I said lets agree to DISAGREE! But that would never be ok with you because you NEED to argue!You seem to have almost a pathological need to be right. I think I already told you I was not interested in your opinion or in you being here at all. I tried to be civil about it. We are too strong minded women who are set in our ways and WE ARE NEVER GOING TO AGREE, OR GET ALONG- therefore one of us needs to go...
Well, this has turned into a kick-a$$ discussion and no mistake.
Sara, you are a girl after my own heart; if I weren't too old (for your mother) I'd get on a plane and come see you :)
To Real WW,
HEEEYYY welcome to the club....
Have you ever heard of KKKAARRRMMAA???(One reaps what they sow) Thanks for telling us that the tables are turning.
Hey thumbs up sistas!!
And yes, you DO envy those BW who get good ones. Stop lying.
:O))))))
I'm sitting here reading some of these replies and just flucking WOW.
To the 1st WW who posted: Nothing you said surprises me. I know a lot of cool WW who have said point blank that they fear/loathe me simply because I can stop ALL conversation just by walking into a room. Doesn't sadden me or make me feel anything other than amused.
To the ignant bish who posted as the 2nd WW:
2 words: BITCH PLEASE. You only want us to take the WM you dont want? TFOOHWTBS. We want your All Star team, not the second/third string. And BTW, you might want to do a better job posting as a WW DBRbm. Nice try though.
Ladies, you have heard from a WW: we are indeed a threat. They fear us because we are becoming what WM want: a strong, intelligent equal partner, not a dependent. Keep doing what it is that you're doing and the men will indeed come for you. because you're what they desire.
thanks Arthur,
I'm just not a fake phoney person, never have been. She's very capable and intelligent. Many blogs would love to have her. I, on the other hand find her insufferable, and would rather get a root canal than listen to her beat another point until it bleeds to death....
Nana, I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me at all. and I am 100% for free speech. But if you had said instead:
Sara you're being deceptive! That's a racist site and everybody knows it. Get real, you're trying to fool people-everybody knows about that site and you' would've had to be living under a rock not to know about it!
If you had said it like that, what do you think your chances of me publishing you would have been?
My mother always told me Respect goes a long way....
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
"Just because alot of us dated and married rich bm, you now want revenge and are taking our good ones."
Listen bitch, I'm not trying to get revenge on WW for taking black men. I have stated time and time again that I don't even LIKE black men. I date white men because I'm young and pretty as fuck and I can. Yes, you heard that right. It's 2008 and I date white men, the REALLY GOOD-LOOKING ones, BECAUSE I CAN. No other reason. Have a nice day. And thank you for your candidness.
Thank You Sara for finally putting it out there that not just WW, but latina and Asian women and women of other cultures seem to hate black women. I've noticed and also resent the fact that we tend to have Asian and Latino womens back like they like us, I've hung around latina women and not the black ones either, when I was younger and I could remember one stating that she thinks big butts are disgusting looking, from there on I knew that they are haters of black women too, and I'm not baseing this on one event either. I think it's time for us to stop uplifting other cultures of women, such as Brazillian or whatever, because in reality they don't respect or like us, black women we need to love ourselves, which I do believe so many do, people will continue to try and make us hate ourselves, don't let them win sista's and as far as hanging around these other women of other cultures that hate us I wouldn't unless I know they're cool as hell. Why play the games with people?
No where did I ever mention RH.!
This is exactly what I am talking about! Your constant need to argue! I was giving that person an example-how did it become about YOU? I refuse to capitulate to need for constant attention. As I have stated before. You're smart, you're capable, and you are highly intelligent. Many blogs would love to have you. This is not one of them! Once again, lets part ways amicably....
Listen Anon.
I know emotions get in the way, but lets try to keep it clean. I think we're all smart enough to make our points without all the profanity-lets all try anyway ok...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Alta said: "Is so much bullshit. Of course they don't look like any race/ethnicity. I've yet to see an orange woman"
You know what this is so real lol... I haven't seen orange myself, and now that I remember there was a woman who, from a distance I thought was a dar-skinned women as she got close I was like WTF! she was a white women who was so burned it was ridiculous it was like she was trying to get to my skin color even if it means being on her death bed to do so, but it didn't quite look like mine it looked burnt and I guess they have the lotion now that makes them look orange, I'm sure in due time they'll figure out how to imitate our skin tone better. So weird! lol...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Personally the comments posted did not surpise or hurt me one bit. I decided a long time ago I don't have ownership of black men. But most important. . .black men do not have ownership of me. I am free to date whomever I please. If only more sistas took control of their destiny and stop basing their choices on the greater BC, we would be a lot further along.
P.S. I love your blog. Keep up the good work.
Phantom said:"I can see and watch an actress on TV like Catherine Zeta Jones and say..yes she's gorgeous."
I feel you I absolutely love Catherine Zeta Jones, she is so gorgeous to me she has always been a favorite of mines, since I was a little girl I always tought of her as classy.
dang I keep comming to these blogs all late LOL
anyways told yall ww and bm were going to unite and try to "keep us in our place" fasten your seat belts sistas its going to be a bumpy ride......
"because it is a racist site"
ech?! from a racist site. No wonder they spoke like that.
Sophisticatedblkwoman, I am not disagreeing with you that some women of other races are extremely condescending of BW. BUT, I have to say that it depends entirely on the person. For example, I have heard a Latina woman say big butts are sexy because SHE WAS A LATINA WITH A BIG BUTT. (Y'all know they exist). Look at Kimora Lee Simmons, look at Aubrey O'Day... these women be loving black women and wishing they were black! I have blonde friends who have openly worshipped me, exclaiming in my moments of low self-confidence (ALL women have them), "But, you're GORGEOUS! That was the first thing I said to her (mutual friend) when I met you! You're EXOTIC!" and who openly tell me that my boyfriend is cute and that I'm really lucky (yes, he's a hot white guy and "their type"). When I'm doubting my relationship, it's them who are my friends telling me to make it work because I have a good man and I'd better hang onto him!
They can HATE you for being on their level; or they can LOVE you, because you're on their level, and for God knows what reason, beautiful women want to surround themselves with other beautiful women, and this is one reason they get perceived as snobby. I guess they like the competition!
One thing I have learned from my white man and some of the white female friends that I have is that to many white people, it's a huge compliment to be called EXOTIC. I used to think it was a backhanded compliment (you know, like, "THAT'S... different) when I heard it and get somewhat offended. But then my man explained to me that this is one of the reasons he was attracted to me; because I was EXOTIC. And my friend said it with so much enthusiasm that I realized it was basically like me telling her she has perky tits. It means I should be incredibly flattered.
Taylor-Sara said...
RH, this is the last comment to you period. That is not what I meant. of course those were the words you used but how could I misrepresent you when nobody but you and I knew that??? Nobody knew until you started up. If you were on this blog it would be just like so many blogs I've seen where the whole conversation begins to revolve around YOU AND YOUR CONSTANT NEED TO ARGUE! NOT HAPPENING HERE! This is too ridiculous for words! like I said any ridiculous minute comment is grounds for you to start your incessant bitching. This blog is about Betterment for black women not bitch central and that is why you are not invited! SAY GOODBYE!!!
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I actually think it's good that Sara posted this excerpt from this website (racist or not). Whenever we start backing down from what we know to be the truth (whether it's because we're trying to please others or feel too tired to fight), excerpts like this remind us that there is a culture war going on and that the future and image of BW (all over the world) is at stake. It's important to know exactly who your enemy is, and to recognize his/her rhetoric and strategies.
I just wanted to post this apology poem by a black male to sistas, it seems they want to stop sistas from expanding their options by all means neccessary, I think this sums everything up,
"The Murder of Black Women; The Apology Have a seat sister; this may take a while. Don't be afraid. The two pistols you see smoking in my hands are harmless now. Both clips are empty, much like a Larry Elders speech. And even though I was aiming at the System when I first unloaded shots into the air, I see now that I missed the target. The System remains intact while you sit wounded and battle-weary from decades of bullets being lodged deep into your heart and soul. I murdered you many times. Still, you didn't die: not even once. I apologize for abandoning you and leaving you to fend for yourself in a world as cruel as it is cold. I should have supported you when you offered to be apart of the struggle. But the struggle was an internal one as well as an external one, and I was losing on both fronts. I got mad at you for straightening your hair, for slow dancing in the arms of white men, for challenging my manhood and comparing it to other races. I hated the way the System divided us by promoting you and demoting me, but instead of uniting with you and having your back, I attacked you and left you alone in your grief. I apologize for flaunting white women in your face as soon as I got money or fame. I was suffering from a mental illness that had me believing that my self-worth had to be approved by blue eyes. I know it hurt you to see me betray you so quickly, so easily, and so often. I had you feeling as though you were not worthy to be in my arms when the opposite was true. I was not worthy of yours. I apologize for calling you a "%#&@$!" and a "hoe" and treating you like a sexual object in my music, and in the streets, and amongst my homeboys. I felt powerless and frustrated, lost in maze of self-hatred. I raped you, and pimped you, and beat you, and cursed you, and tried to destroy you in the same way I felt destroyed. The pressures of society triggered the implosion that almost destroyed everything inside of me. And you got caught up in the blast because you were always so determined to stand firmly by my side. I murdered you many times. Still, you didn't die: not even once. I apologize for cheating on you, abusing you, and leaving you as soon as you got pregnant. I pretended like the child wasn't mine. I even asked you to kill the baby because I knew I wasn't responsible enough to rear him/her properly. When you refused, I reluctantly tossed you a few dollars each month and felt like that's all I had to do to be a father. I apologize for turning you into a single mother instead of a happy wife. I apologize for selling drugs and going to prison and using the streets as an excuse for my failure. I didn't want to be like the honest folks in my hood who worked hard and had nothing to show for it. I wanted more out of life but didn't have the courage or the insight to follow the path of the brothers who worked hard in school to build stable futures and lives for themselves. I grew up angry at the world and my environment. But instead of using this anger in a constructive manner, I beat down and shot up the first brother who stepped on my shoes in the club. I apologize for dying so young in the streets. I just wanted respect. I just wanted power. And the only people in my hood who possessed these qualities were the gangsters and thugs and dealers. You warned me to be careful. You begged me to slow down. But I didn't listen. The respect of the street was all I had. It was something I was willing to kill for, to even die for. I was fighting a war against myself, and dying for a cause that didn't exist. I apologize for breaking your heart and betraying your trust and hurting you so badly that you became almost as racist as the System. You started calling all black men dogs and writing cruel little Waiting to Exhale type books that spent too much time degrading me instead of explaining that good black men are the majority. Your anger and books flew high, like African Jehaka birds, towards the tree branches of my soul. But instead of forgiving me and attempting to rebuild your nest, your anger and books became woodpeckers and pecked away at what was left of me. You screamed out that good black men were hard to find and blamed me for your actions when you held white men in your arms. I tried to tell you that I was the minority, and that good black men were everywhere, but it was easier for you to point fingers at me than it was to give these brothers a chance. I should have treated you like the queen that you are so that other black men wouldn't be falsely accused of my emotional crimes. I murdered you many times. Still, you didn't die: not even once. I apologize for encouraging you to be materialistic. I dumped my money into the same System that was destroying me and tried to impress you with expensive cars, platinum jewelry, and Polo gear. I fooled you into thinking that the measure of a man was in his bank account or in the size of the knot in his front pocket. You jumped into the front seat of my Lexus, happy because your friends were now envious of you, as we both sped down a dead end road at one hundred miles per hour. As a result, many black men who didn't own a Lexus were ignored and even dismissed by you. I had you believing that your love came with a price tag. I apologize for the late night booty calls. You wanted to talk, to cuddle, and to explore the depth of my character. I only wanted sex. I called you when I was horny and only reached out to you when I saw that you were slipping away. I should have talked to you and opened up to you. Instead, I trusted only my homeboys and factored you out of the equation. And I apologize for turning you against your friends and family members. I was jealous of their influence over you. I was afraid that you would listen to them when they told you that I was not good for you. I didn't have a job, and when I did, I used it as a weapon against you. When wise sisters told you to raise your standards, I persuaded you to lower them. I had you thinking that you had to have a man, any man, to be complete. And I apologize for that. I murdered you many times, sister. Yet, incredibly, amazingly, you didn't die. Not even once."
Anonymous said: "Look at Kimora Lee Simmons, look at Aubrey O'Day... these women be loving black women and wishing they were black!"
I feel what you are saying and I also agree that these "mixed" women you have stated would want nothing more than to be full blown black and I actually admire that about them. Thanks for your response very insightful.
What about Black Latinas? They also get forgotten about..
Hmmm...in regard to the poem, I hope you all noticed how the author backhandedly blames BW as well.
I was wondering the same thing Zabeth...
Regarding the apology, we dont want any apologies. We want good men.
If the shoe was on the other foot and a bw was writing this, she would be the devil. I think he was pointing his own faults as well as the BW, but it's not enough. Saying and doing are two different things.
As for Bill Cosby, the truth is the truth no matter how much it hurts, but yet BM are getting offended and quick to point out his flaws with the lawsuit and all.
for the poem...
we accept your apology and we've forgiven you. however we've moved on, good in luck life.
That poem is ridiculous. Can no one see that he is actually trying to blame black women. These people never stop.
I think that poem is like an abuser.
Beat down...
I'm sorry...
Beat down...
I'm sorry...
At some point the one being abused has to realize that they cycle won't stop and MUST get out.
I would not be surprised to see more "brothas" come out in droves with this kind of thing. i.e. the poetic apology, the songs in music, some BET presentation, a "love letter" to the sistas.
The problem is many sistas fall for it and that is why they do it. But again it is back to the Beat down after that.
That poem still does not show personal accountablity.
Reference the poem:
CW says "More Cock & Bull without any change"
Boy y'all are no fools that's for sure!
Um whomever says Kimora wants to be black, she is a biracial woman of black and asian heritage. Trust me when I say she is not proud as u may think. On many occasions she has stated that black women were jealous of her. She seems to be "black" when its convenient for her. There are many biracial/black women who are proud blackwomen, Kimora is not one of them.
so back to topic....
Apologies are useless if they are not followed by ACTIONS. As we all know actions speak louder.
Black women expand your horizons with or without apologies. There are many wonderful men outhere and they comein many shades. DONT LIMIT YOURSELF.
in addition to that i must sing that song from the band One Republic feat. Timbaland....
..."it's too late to apoligize...it's to laaate...i said it's to late to apologize...it's to laaaaate"
ya'll get the gist of it,lol.
here's the video for the song, it goes perfectly for this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DzK7XcMACY
Taylor-sara, I like your blog but you did not need to call someone else a bitch or demand that they leave. You can both respectfully disagree without using nasty words can't you? No matter the circumstances, hurling abuse even if you feel it is justified always reflects negatively on the parties involved, no matter the provocation. Grace and dignity are the way to go sis', afterall it's not that bad is it? It's not like she smashed your car or killed someone? All she did as far as I can tell was voice her own opinion regarding the comments made on that blog - you are well within your rights to refute or ignore her statements but namecalling is so not on. It should not be that easy to tip us bw over the edge should it? Just my take.
I never called her a bitch! and I never would! You need to read again Anon. I said she was constantly Bitching and this was not bitch central (in other words a place where we gather to bitch) I would never call her a bitch and I resent you stating that I did. I respect her very much. She's bright as hell and very smart, but her need to nitpick and her penchant for arguing make her a bad fit for this blog. I do not feel I need to explain to you or anyone why I do not want a particular person on MY blog... I have my reasons and that's all you need to know.
Anonymous said: "Um whomever says Kimora wants to be black, she is a biracial woman of black and asian heritage".
I'm not disagreeing with you, I've observed the same resentment she has towards a good % of black women (if not most), I just figured it may be due to her wanting to be full blown black, because I don't know too many sista's that will be jealous of someone with a wormy neck, that can only be treated and not fixed permanently. I don't know too many sista's that are a fan of hers, due to her attitude towards us, other than being a fan of how she is banking off of the nice fashions she have out, Tyra and her other small % of hollywood sista's that dig her. I'm not a fan of hers personally and would never be; however I respect what she does to bank and those beautiful little girls of hers, hopefully for their sake she doesn't keep the hate alive through them they're too cute :)
"...I don't know too many sista's that are a fan of hers, due to her attitude towards us, other than being a fan of how she (Kimora Lee) is banking off of the nice fashions she have out, Tyra and her other small % of hollywood sista's that dig her."
bw need to stop buying these ghetto fab clothes. Diddy, Kimora, Phat Farm, Akademiks and other similar lines make the bc their cash cow. Once they get the billions from the bc, they change over into more mainstream (read EXCLUSIVE) gear that blks cannot really afford. sudden blks are not modeling the clothes on the runway (Baby Phat already has lots of ww models---among others).
THIS is how you get respect. By not being part of the "cash cow" to make those who disrepect...rich.
Kimora's clothing are trashy and who wants to look trashy. Kimora is in the entertainment business; therefore, she can dress a certain way. I bet her daughters will dress more modestly while growing up. P. Diddy what a ucking hypocrite. He lived this thuggish life and now he wants everyone to believe he is this conservative type of guy or more main stream. Hey, P. why don't you marry your babies' mother. P. Diddy tries to pattern his self after Donald Trump; but, Trump at least married his babies' mothers. Ann F.
Anonymous said: "bw need to stop buying these ghetto fab clothes. Diddy, Kimora, Phat Farm, Akademiks and other similar lines make the bc their cash cow. Once they get the billions from the bc, they change over into more mainstream (read EXCLUSIVE) gear that blks cannot really afford. sudden blks are not modeling the clothes on the runway (Baby Phat already has lots of ww models---among others).
THIS is how you get respect. By not being part of the "cash cow" to make those who disrepect...rich".
I don't buy any of the hip hop type of stuff for me or my child "sweetie", I've seen a show with Kimora's fashion and I like the tops and more of the classy styles she was showing, but anyway that was the only time I've saw her fashion line I don't see any problem with thinking some of her fashions are nice. I would buy Stevie Wonders wife's fashions (btw I don't even wear tennis shoes only heels, so hip hop styles aren't me anyway), before I buy any hip-hop bull. The items I saw and mentioned with Kimora was not the hip hop version and to add most of the black females I see in school or around me don't wear that shit either, it still doesn't change that Kimora is a mogul, thank you very much. Lastly, just because you are not able to afford certain fashions doesn't mean other black women can't either.
Personally, I think Diddy, Kimora are quite boring. They are very good at business and I respect them. But I think that some of the black men, and white women who made comments on the blog, trying to degrade us and just very sad and silly people who have nothing better to do. The world is moving on and changing, and unfortunately, they are being and will be left behind. We black woman must continue to educate ourselves, start our own businesses and or whatever we do best. Make ourselves gorgeous, when people hate you so much, you know that you are doing something good.
Sophisticated said:
...I don't buy any of the hip hop type of stuff for me or my child "sweetie".
... it still doesn't change that Kimora is a mogul, thank you very much. Lastly, just because you are not able to afford certain fashions doesn't mean other black women can't either.
--------------------------------
I detected an "angry" tone towards me for my comments. You deem yourself "sophisticated". So my comments were not specifically for YOU. I shared my opinion as have everyone else here.
I never said Kimora was NOT a mogul. She is indeed uber rich. Big ups to her. And Diddy.
Trust and believe I can afford just about anything I want in the fashion sense. Without going into debt. There was no need for the personal "dig". I did not direct my comments to you personally. There are more than 100 other commenters here. What was the "sweetie" moniker for?
I would not buy most of the stuff Kimora is peddling 'cos the few of her creation's that I have spied here and there are not my style at all. But I will support a bw in her business venture. Does Kimora identify herself as black? Or is it only for marketing purposes? I don't know much about her to be honest. On the other hand I would NEVER buy anything P Diddy is selling because he deemed it acceptable to use non-black women in his advertising campaign. For that act alone he will NEVER get my money- his clothing line, CD's, whatever he is involved in, I will surely abstain from.
Back to the topic...
It is so tragic that there are bm walking around simmering with such self-hate and even sadder that they choose to vent their failure and frustrations on bw - as if bw are the mules who must bear the brunt of everyones unhappiness...definitely time to move on. I have always been a supporter of IRR, now more than ever. I know not all bm are this way but for the women who come into contact with these types - run for your lives.
Anonymous said: "I detected an "angry" tone towards me for my comments. You deem yourself "sophisticated". So my comments were not specifically for YOU. I shared my opinion as have everyone else here.
I never said Kimora was NOT a mogul. She is indeed uber rich. Big ups to her. And Diddy.
Trust and believe I can afford just about anything I want in the fashion sense. Without going into debt. There was no need for the personal "dig". I did not direct my comments to you personally. There are more than 100 other commenters here. What was the "sweetie" moniker for?"
Ummmmm! Sounds so familiar, you must be one of the kids that came to post from C1's blog. It must really suck to have to post anonymous.
Sophisticated stated:"Ummmmm! Sounds so familiar, you must be one of the kids that came to post from C1's blog. It must really suck to have to post anonymous."
See, why the name calling? This is negativity. Also, I am not a kid. There was nothing in my original post that eluded to you on a personal level.
What I noticed was that you did not answer my question as to why the angry tone towards me in your first post. I did not refer to you in any way nor did I disrespect you. The other women here did not get offended by my original post.
Why was I singled out by you in such an angry way? Calling me "Sweetie" and "Just because you cannot afford..." I am looking to comprehend the vitriol you directed at me.
Listen Anon. this blog is about BW BETTERMENT! NOT BITCH CENTRAL! If you are just coming here to cause chaos, I suggest you move on! There are plenty of blogs that cater to that nonsense. This is not one of them!
Sara you do not have to post this comment if you wish not to.
If you read my original post, there was nothing in it to belittle "Sophisticated". It was a general post about how bw can stop making rich those who do not respect us.
I asked her what in my post moved her to take a personal swing at me. And I did so without calling names or otherwise disrespecting anyone.
It is unfortunate that I've been made to seem like I am "starting something".
Does Kimora identify herself as black?
-----
The reason I'm quoting this is to ask what you mean by that? Because some people feel the need to MAKE mixed people claim one thing or another. Example: Black or White. They can't do that. They're mixed. They're BOTH. Let me say that this isn't some personal attack against you before anyone makes it seem that way. I've been thinking about this for a while. This is why some mixed kids have such low self esteem, like this girl I know.Others told her that she can't be both. Most times the ignorant people claim them as black as if the white parent was just a sperm donner/incubator.
Alta I agree. However I think most black people are looking to their own experience and expecting everyone to follow suit. You see 90% of black people have at least 2 other races in them. usually white and something else. In our family it's indian and white. When we were kids in the summertime, we would all turn red and my grandfather would was a proud old Indian would smiled when he looked at us and call us his little papooses (baby indians.) We all identify simply as black, However my brother Pedro, who is half spanish identifies as half and half because he looks so spanish that spanish people actually get offended (very offended) if he tries to identify as simply black. (He has hair down his back and is about 1 shade darker than an ordinary spanish person, and speaks spanish) That coupled with his name makes people assume he is ONLY spanish. Just like my brother Kimora could never get away with claiming only black since she looks Asian.....
Anon. If I jumped the gun on you yesterday, I want to apologize. I admit I only skimmed the postings, but it seemed to me you were starting with her. But lets focus on the betterment of BW and not on pettiness (that's to everyone, not just you) ok. We are all here for the same reasons....
Sara, LOL...you have your own rainbow coaliation.
A F
"I guess they have the lotion now that makes them look orange, I'm sure in due time they'll figure out how to imitate our skin tone better. So weird! lol..."
I think it's pretty funny looking when some of them women dye their hair blond and get the fake orange tans. I call them pumpkin people. LOL!
I respect where Taylor-Sara is coming from but I would like to see you write more posts on preserving a securing IRR unions as opposed to fighting with white women. You don't have to reiterate that white women are jealous of black women. It's not a secret. All posts such as this one do is bring along crazy trolls.
Sometimes this site annoys me because none of these topics are about the RELATIONSHIPS! I'm too blessed to worry my head about stupid white, latinas and asian women (who usually don't do anyone any harm, Asian women). I don't care what they do because(unfortunately) their unions never last long and I'm 20xs better looking than 99% of them.
Honestly, I've never met a black man who was in an IR union with a non-black woman and happy. Most of the women end up with several children and pathetically depressed. Is it because they dated a black man? no! Because they made ignorant choices based on a stereotype or their low personal self-hate. As a non-black woman why she dates someone of another race and you'll find it has nothing to do with love.
Sometimes I question this blog owner's motivation as well because if you're so in love with your husband, why not write more posts telling us about your love... instead of always writing negativity? I think you just lost a subscriber.
hairsmystory.com
To Leanne,
there are so many blogs out there, that have all sorts of posts. I don't understand this whole idea of trying to tell someone what they can and cannot put on THEIR OWN blog.
From the number of comments all pf Sara's post have received, it is quite obvious that there are many people (bw) out there who she speaks to. So please, let her be!
Excluse you leanne I am not fighting with anyone! and I never said ww were jealous of BW! And if this site annoys you, heres a thought -GO ELSEWHERE!!!!
lEANE
Ms ignorant. You don't come on someone's blog and talk to them like a dog what the hell is your problem. You need to take your azz on because... well i will leave it alone because sara said don't be petty. but you need to take your azz on. And for the record you're the type we WANT to lose!!!
@Leanne..
Leanne, there is no need to be disrepectful to Sara..remember you can always write your own blog, but please remember that this one is called "Sara's interracial blog" not "leanne's interracial blog"...as such, Sara is certainly able to pick and choose the subjects for discussion, and the manner in which she wishes to maintain her blog. She is also free to NOT discuss aspects of her personal life, if that is her wish...and frankly, it is none of our business, and entirely up to her to share what she wants to.
As someone who states you do not wish to discuss ww, I find it curious that in your profile the first three movies you pick as your favorite are...
1-Clueless
2-Legally Blonde
3-My Fair lady...
(Probably Becky's (ie the ww you do not wish to discuss) favorite all time movies..lol)
Not to mention your description of yourself as a fair maiden..perhaps you should think about what it really means to use that expression..HINT..traditionally the use of the word fair in old time literature has to do with the color of the ww's skin...ie fair= light/white- |maiden is ususally a virgin of course.
Anyway, just remember, you can start your own blog, and discuss ALL you ever care to...and if you are truly unhappy with this blog, then by all means, "unsubscribe" as you say. I am pretty sure no one here will mind. We just want to have conversations about all kinds of things related to this genre..not what Leanne deems we should talk about. Even a 21 year old should realize it is not always about her.
I'm not trying to be mean to you, but when you are wrong, you are wrong...and like I said..It is very easy to start a blog..and I encourage you to do so. May I be so bold as to suggest a name for such blog.."Leanne's perfect non-annoying blog that is not about ww, and all about her happy personal life and love relationships"......... I am sure you would have a lot of hits.
I went to Leanne's site and she has alot of pictures of ww...why? Are you bi-racial? Lets talk about your choice of favorite movies and why those particular movies at your age? Are you a hair stylist? Since, you have your own blog why aren't you speaking about your personal life? Just asking?
Ann F.
No one is being disrespectful to Sara, but I would like to hear more advice than bickering about white woman. No, I am not biracial and I have a lot of photos of CELEBRITIES of all ethnicities. YES! At 21, I'm too busy living life to harbor hatred for white women and decide to NOT write about a celebs terrible choice at a hairdo just because they are white. Would you rather me call out black women all the time?
I've just reach a bit of annoyance with the main blogger because for the past couple of weeks I've noticed the samee recycled topics. I personally don't get why it bothers her so much... she's a dumb white woman and the guys who agreed with her are stupid too. How is talking about the issue all the time helping black women in interracial relationships?
Why can't there be posts about the problems they face relating to each other; blended IR familes; raising kids or discussing pregnancy. There are so many other topics to discuss and white women are so not on my radar so why should I care what they think and do?
Girl, don't go there about the hairstylist and me being biracial because now you just sound silly. No I am not biracial and even if I was... so what? You want to date white males but you don't like biracial girls? Sounds a little confused to me.... So what will you tell the children you have with these white men? Deny your white family members? grow up, seriously. You sound nuts at that point.
Taylor-Sara: Stop worrying about white women and just do you. Write more interesting articles about subjects that are relevant to IR couples because let's be honest: I've never fought with any of my exes about what black men and white women think about our union. Who cares? WE are happy and lets keep it that way.
Annoymous: Naw, boo! I'm not stupid. I'm actually very smart and don't spend much of my time getting upset over what some foolish females says about black women. I'd be a pretty insecure and downtrodden human if I was.
Seriously, who goes into a relationship and discussing everyone else's distaste for the union every second?
Taylor-Sara, you are so right! This is your blog and you may write whatever you wish. But, word to the wise:
If you spend your life dwelling on the negative, don't get mad when you reach opposition. Not every IR couple goes through everyday strife and I KNOW you and your husband cannot be dealing with animosity from the outside world every second of the day? Y'all don't ever have happy times to write about? There's nothing else you know about IR unions beside strife and chaos? Heck! I can give you a plethora of topics to discuss besides getting hung-up and fighting with white women on your site. Who said you were jealous of white women?
Whoa! So because my favorite movies are Clueless and Legally Blonde it means I must be white???!!!
Hahahahahahahahahaha!
And you want to date outside your race but you ignorantly stereotype your own people? Chick... are you serious? Wow! Okay, best of luck to you getting a man. But, believe me... I'm very much black. And black enough not to assume that because a person doesn't know every BET blackbuster movie on the TV and lives outside of the conventional mode (the same one Sara writes about 24/7) doesn't mean they are any less black.
smh. I've got to send this one to all my other , "Legally Blonde", old-school movie-loving BLACK (oh, sorry they can't classify anymore, so now they are white) friends.
what the hell are you still bitching about? You said this blog was not your taste. So I just have one question. Why the hell are you still here? Go back to your own site and do whatever the hell you do. I did not appreciate the way you came to my site and got disrespectful, then you said you were leaving but your still here whining and complaining. I will talk about whatever the hell I want to! Do I come to your site and tell you what to talk about? Get the hell off my blog and don't worry about future comments because you will be deleted! I am Not the one!
Lord! The nuts come out in full force. What was the hair lady saying? She spent way too much time defending her position that didn't make too much sense. If you don't like it here, leave. Sara, this is the same BS that plagued Evia's site. From the time her site was created in 2006 till now, so many blogs have sprouted. There are blogs by IR couples that so many of these women who want to dictate what goes on to your blog, can go over to these sites if they're not happy here. That word to wise message by the hair lady was laughable and condescending at best. Sara, please be more generous with the delete button. These off topics to personally gripe about the content or the bloggers themselves always takes away from the topic of discussion.
I'm so weary and tired of the self-righteousness of so called well adjusted bw folks.
Anon. you are so right. and yes I will be much more generous with the delete in the future. More and more I see what Evia had to put up with....
.. More and more I see what Evia had to put up with....
Well, as long as you don't bow out like Evia, at least for a while :[
I'm not going anywhere Authur, they can bring it!
I've never commented on this blog on any other IR blog before, but this post made me. It's a sad state of affairs when when the very man that is supposed to stand up for you when nobody else will, sells you out. These BM posting on that site are an abomination to their race. I almost believe that one of those posters was someone posting as a BM, but not truly one. I've found in observing different writing styles on boards, when one wants to cause a disruption, they'll post things to incite anger and discontent. This sounds like one of those posters may have been a WM projecting.
Anyway...on to the women that were stating how they're not worried about a BM stealing away their BM. There's an old saying. Doth does protest too much. Eh? How can you convince me you're not worried but you write with such venom and loathing...and jealousy? I can't count the amount of times a BM has come on to me, propositioned me, flirted with me; in the presence of his revered WM. You don't have to be worried or concerned about me, but your man is.
I've never dated IR, but I'm at that age now where I'm keeping my options open. Men of all races have always flirted with me, but I was never really interested in pursuing it before. Life is too short and I'm ready to finally broaden my options. I still love BM, but I'm no longer limiting myself. Why should I? They surely aren't.
In closing. To the BW who were offended by these ignorant posters. Don't be. BW are the most imitated women to ever grace God's green earth. Why are the plastic surgery numbers at an all time high for, lip injections and butt implants. Why are tanning salons such big business that they had to make a reality show around it? I'll leave you with another observation. Why is it that Bo Derek can wear braids and it be beautiful? Why when a WM has an ass, it's all of sudden IN. Some BM have been brainwashed just like the rest of America. Don't be mad at them. Pity them for not being strong-minded enough to know when they've been bamboozled into a recless train of thought that disrespects everything about their mother, sister and daughters. When they dishonor BW, they're dishonoring every black woman that has had to ever raise a BM that they couldn't or wouldn't do.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home